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[OT] Silly stories using 4 things

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  • [OT] Silly stories using 4 things

    I received an e-mail from a friend earlier this week:

    I lost a bet, so my debt was to write a story including the following 4 elements:
    a streetlamp that only turns on during the day
    pearl earrings
    a Good Humor ice cream man
    the morse code letter "L"

    You can do better, eh? Or try these:
    a broken answering machine
    a ukelele
    the Braille letter "P"
    a cereal box
    Here is my attempt. Please keep this topic reserved for other people's stories, and not muddled with comments or tangents!

    ------------------The Braille Flakes Receptionist------------------

    [Ring.] [Ring.]

    "Good afternoon, Braille Flakes, Inc. How may I direct your call?"

    "Um, I'm having a problem. The milk makes it too soggy to read."

    "Sir, please read the box. Our cereal is intended to be eaten dry, as a snack. The back of the box, in many spoken and Braille languages, clearly tells you that we are not responsible for dysfunctional use caused by adding milk; nor are we responsible if chance happens to arrange the Braille Flakes into an insulting word."

    "Oh. Uh, thank you."

    "You are welcome. Have a good day."

    [Ring.] [Ring.]

    "Good afternoon, Braille Flakes, Inc. How may I direct your call?"

    "On your web page you have the Braille alphabet, and some words to try. I'm stuck on #3, which seems to say UKUPWE."

    "There is space after the vertical row of three dots. That's an L E, not a P."

    "Oh. Got it now. Duh, I should have gotten that myself. My grandfather played one. Thanks."

    "You are welcome. Have a good day."

    [Ring.] [Ring.]

    "Good afternoon, Braille Flakes, Inc. How may I direct your call?"

    "I can't get it! Damn you all! I'm trying to spell out an epic poem but your stupid cereal doesn't have enough S's! Why don't..."

    "One moment, Bill. I'll transfer you to product development's office yet again. Thank you for holding."

    Mrs. Snanderdoodle, hired last week, is now the backbone of Braille Flakes, Inc. The building's other employees believe their answering machines have become temperamental. Since she was hired their departments receive very few messages, aside from Screaming Bill's.
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